Thursday, July 03, 2008

"Amy looks like" fun!

Ok, so apparently Google is more entertaining than I ever imagined. A girl I work with, the lovely Marie, prompted me to type "Amy looks like," quotation marks and all, into the search line. Here are some of the winning phrases, categorized, of course!


Compliments
(Why so few???)

Amy looks like...fun! - that is good to hear!

Amy looks like...a sweet, grand lady! - maybe I would appreciate this more if I was 50.

Amy looks like...she is going to be a wonderful addition to your team! - I like to think so!

Amy looks like...an angel flying through the sky/All the birds and planes pass her by. - okay, angel is nice, but birds are passing me? I must be the slowest angel in heaven...



Famous People

(always an exciting comparison)

Amy looks like...the real Marilyn, and acts like her as well. - ok, the looks were fine, but act? really?

Amy looks like...a peanuts character - You know, I think that is pretty accurate!



Amy looks like...Harry Potter from that angle - ouch.

Amy looks like...a deformed Nicole Kidman - double ouch.

Amy looks like...Janice from "Friends" - triple swirling tornado ouch!

Amy looks like...a really tall Cabbage Patch Kid who holds a little dog - I am trying to picture what this would even look like. I'm drawing a blank.

Amy looks like...the witch from The Wizard of Oz - hmmm...the smashed one or the green one?


ANIMALS

(who doesn't love furry little creatures?)

Amy looks like...she has lived nine lives - obviously referencing a cat. very flattering. I think. Maybe not.

Amy looks like...a hairy, dirty ape. - only sometimes.

Amy looks like...Jay Leno’s sister….or a horse! - I don't really know how I should take this, but it makes me feel a little sorry for poor Jay...



Amy looks like...re-inflated roadkill - wow. I thought about adding a picture, but...well...yeah, this one speaks for itself.

Amy looks like...a manbeast - I want to dedicate this one to my roomie, Ashley. At least the Spawn of Satan only called you a "boy."


PERSONAL ATTACKS

(why so harsh?)

Amy looks like...a blow up doll. I always thought Amy was weird. - this is a little reminiscent of "Lars and the Real Girl." I don't like the thought of that.

Amy looks like...an old hag with blond hair. - suddenly "sweet, grand lady" is very appealing.

Amy looks like...a drag queen. - ok, this is crossing the line!


Amy looks like...some Victorian Spacewoman from the Future. - I secretly wish this were true.

Amy looks like...a Catholic Republican Army Wife into Politics and Religion and Iraq. - this is quite specific, and almost entirely wrong. I like to think of myself as a Mormon Moderate Single Student into Accounting and Biking and Africa.

Amy looks like...a Tesco checkout girl with a drinking problem. - hey, I am working on it! And I work at Maverick, not Tesco! (j/k)


ACTIONS

(these are the funniest)

Amy looks like...she needs to use soap. -it's true. luckily, I do (use soap, I mean).

Amy looks like...she's been eating gravel by the roadside. -I can feel my teeth chip as I read this.

Amy looks like...she has lost weight. Amy's fat. - way to DESTROY all those years I spent building self-esteem, but I guess it is comforting to know that it looks like I am losing, not gaining.

Amy looks like...she is supposed to be fighting a stale crumpet. - I will admit it - before this post I did not even know for sure what a crumpet is. For future reference, it is an English Muffin, and I have no desire to fight a stale one of those suckers.


Amy looks like...she's about to sneeze. -I just did.

Amy looks like...she's trying too hard, like always. - probably true, but who isn't trying too hard?

Amy looks like...still looks like a good girl while striking the rude girl pose. -I laugh out loud at this one! It is just too accurate!

Amy looks like...she has a bruise, but I suppose a skin disease is better than having been, perhaps, punched in the face. -this reminds me of the time I got a black eye playing racquetball. Personally, I think a black eye is better than a skin disease. eewww!

Amy looks like...she had the dress made to match her wallpaper. - this makes me hum songs from "The Sound of Music," but I guess Maria used drapes, not wallpaper, right?


Amy looks like...she’s in mid-eyeroll . . . and when Amy rolls her eyes at you for being grating, then you got problems. -my favorite description.

Amy looks like...she's a hair away from some really terrifying pictures as she engages in battle with her shoe. - what does this mean?

Amy looks like...she's about two rhinestones away from a wardrobe malfunction. -Note to self - NEVER Google "rhinestones."


And, of Course, a couple of profound favorites...


Amy looks like...Ruth looks like Amy looks just like Ruth… - Wow! How cool is that! I think we probably do look alike...


And the ultimate...Amy would be an embarrassment to the Bond series. - ok, I know it doesn't start with "Amy looks like," but it came up on the search, and I was stunned!

PS - it is not true. I would be the best Bond girl there ever was...




2 comments:

Ruth and Jordan said...

How did that Ruth one come up? weird. also, for some reason, I see you as being a really good Christmas (Jones??) hmmm...

Anonymous said...

maybe not christmas, since it only comes once a year. you should try to marry someone with the last name "broadchest."


also... this was hilarious! i laughed out loud :)